I really do believe things happen for a reason, but often we don’t see the reason till much later down the road. Especially if the “thing” is an illness or loss. We sometimes think if we do the right thing with integrity and a good attitude, then it all has to just fall in place, right?
Well, what if it is all just falling into place, just not as you had hoped or envisioned. For instance, losing a lawsuit in my case was a financial disaster for me, but it gave me an opportunity to move to TN for a while; a dream I have had for years.
I get to TN, my son hates it and I wind up coming back. HMM, so much for that I thought. Guess I am not supposed to be in the mountains, but I couldn’t figure out why. I knew I manifested it. How could it not have been the perfect destination? Sure, sure, it was part of my journey you can say but it’s still frustrating when you haven’t figured out the whys of the journey. I mean no one takes a trip or a vacation without a goal. You don’t just say, "I am going to the airport" and get on a plane without knowing why. So, I think it is a fair question.
While in Tennessee I told God, "if you really want me back in Florida you are going to have to get me a job." In less than 24 hours I had one. I was stunned. Kicking and screaming I put my furniture, etc. in storage, packed up my Nissan to the max and got on Hwy 24 East.
I kid you not about packing it to the max. I took some of my CDs out of the box and was squeezing them into any nook and cranny I could find. I wasn’t about to leave The Dave Matthews Band in a cold storage unit in the mountains. I even got pulled over in Georgia because the cop said he couldn’t see in the car, He thought my windows were tinted too dark and apparently that is illegal in Geprgia. (You might need that information one day!)
So I pulled into Florida on a Thursday evening and Monday I was off to my new job and a whole new adventure. Within a week I knew it wouldn’t last. I didn’t just “walk out” of that job, I RAN and I RAN FAST!
The weeks to follow were pretty crazy. I could fill you in on the details, but you just might not believe me. Sometimes I don’t!
So let me get to the point of all this. SEEK THE OPPORTUNITY.
Ever since I took my first Integrated Energy Therapy course back in 2008, I knew it was something I wanted to do for the rest of my life. The healing that took place was so powerful. Not only did I love to receive I.E.T., but I loved to give I.E.T. Integrated Energy Therapy works from the heart and that surge of pure love that I experienced was overwhelming. Connecting through the heart, to Mother Earth, Divine Wisdom and to each other has the power to create miracles. Hence, the name Heartlinked!
As I was going through this“stuff” I had some good friends say to me, "You have the tools, you know what to do." I knew they were right but that tool box was looking heavy and I knew if I opened it I would find a note saying "GET OFF YOUR FREAKING SOAP BOX AND DO SOME SELF WORK!! " I would walk past the tool box give it a cute smirk and say, "Yeah Yeah, I see you." I mean there were other things I needed to do.
Then the other day the tool box jumped off the darn table and knocked me down. I had no choice now. The lid flew open and exposed itself to me.
What the heck am I talking about, you ask?
I started to feel sick last week. I was actually looking forward to the weekend. I had some cool stuff planned for myself and all the kids were out of town. No obligations to anyone but me. How awesome! But starting Friday night I got this intense feeling something spiritual was stirring. I am extremely sensitive to those energies and was trying to figure out just what they had up their sleeves. I don’t know do they have sleeves?
I spent 2 hours just sitting and listening to a lecture on love that night. A friend had told me about a guy named Barry Long from Australia who I suppose was a meta-physician. It was supposed to be about love making, which I didn’t think I needed any help on. However, it was way more. I suggest you check it out, if you feel called to do so. It’s pretty “deep” and perhaps it is not what you need to hear right now, although I think everyone should listen. It may not only get you to take a better look at your own relationship, but get you to see how we have gotten to this point in time, where fear and anger have such a strong hold on our planet.
Saturday I spent much of the day in meditation, searching in my soul as to why I was so sad and reflecting on my divorce. Nothing too pleasant there! By Monday I was full blown DOWN! I spent the last 3 days with no sleep and no energy, just tossing and turning in the spiritual energy I knew was coming. Silly me thought it was going to be uplifting, instead it knocked me off my ass. I cried like a baby, releasing. I did extensive Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping) on myself. I was dousing myself in Essential Oils. Crud was coming up; I had no desire to look at. My eyes were being open to memories and moments I had suppressed. My internal ears were hearing words I did not want to bear. I thought for sure the next day would bring good news and a born again me. Instead I woke up saying, OH NO, here AGAIN!
Then last night I had an a-ha moment. The theory behind I.E.T is that we hold emotions on a cellular level. Our muscles, tissues and organs carry the weight of our past, they hold our traumas. I realized I was having a lot of regrets lately. They were churning in my mind, keeping me paralyzed and causing bad dreams. There’s nothing worse than trying to rest and there it is in your sleep reminding you, "you screwed up!" Regret is held in our shoulders. Not sure if you ever noticed but the word shoulders contains the word SHOULD, and that is what regrets are; you should haves and should not haves.
I reached over to my left shoulder’s I.E.T. pressure point and OH BOY, there it was. I wasn’t even aware of the pain I was bearing. The soreness was intense and with some work, I got to release much of it. I could feel it coming out of my tiny little toe. There was tingling down my left leg as energy was being driven out. This stuff works, why the heck have I been neglecting myself? “I HAVE THE TOOLS”
Today, I grabbed my tool box with anticipation. I picked up my I.E.T. manuals! They’ve been peeking out at me from the shelves. I felt it was time to review. I knew inside those pages was the answer as to why I was so weak and WHY my “journey” led me back here.
I discovered I needed to heal relationships. I needed to sever some as well. I needed to Dive in to what I serves me. I needed to regain my bliss with the power of love.
Spirit knows what you want, spirit knows what you need. I needed rest, I needed self reflection, and I needed I.E.T.!
Am I scared to take on my soul’s calling? A bit. I suppose that is why I have been avoiding it. These emotions are held in the Solar plexus and kidneys and that is what I will be addressing next.
I am happy to say, my shoulder is feeling better. I may just get dressed today.